Dana Moran

Design Editor, Editor in Chief, Feature Editor, Asst. Feature Editor, Hurricane/Brokeback

Fall 2003-Spring 2007

I’ve thought for a long time about how I would write this thing, wished I could write one at the end of every semester to remember the papers and people gone by. But now there’s really only one way to do this: on the porch, with a Keystone, the way it all started.

Roho: I remember when you came into Signora Barbarino’s class with your face cut to hell, not knowing what had gone down at beer pong that Thursday. I also had no idea what was in store for me. Everything I know today, be it about comma use, how to deal with assholes or when to give a fuck, I learned from you. Thank you for hiring me over Liza Johnson, for making me grilled cheese to fall asleep on, for carrying me home drunk, for everything.

Snowflake: One of my first D.O. memories is you driving me home when we were both Rob’s assistants and hearing ‘Fred Jones, Part 2’ for the first time. My favorite memories with you are too numerous to list, and there’s a reason you were one of the first people I asked for in the hospital. I miss belting out ‘El Scorcho’ with you, you not letting me spoon with you except for that one time when I really needed it and playing endless games of Mario Kart. I love you, too.

Colin: I’m not gonna lie, I had to look up ‘vernacular’ when you told me to write myself into it. Silly freshman. You were the first one to make me feel comfortable in the office … by calling me a whore. I’ll miss being the only person you know in Syracuse, but I know we’ll keep running into each other along the road of life.

The Feature Cock: We had a good run together, you and me, but I couldn’t quite save you from Brian Tahmosh. Maybe we’ll meet in another life.

Jippy: Dear god, were we ever young and crazy. That’s all I can really say about all that. You’re good people; don’t ever forget it.

Leyla/Meg/Anne: Let’s face it; the three of you were always a trifecta to me. A Jeep just pulled up across the street, blasting ‘Pussy Poppin’.’ I think that says it all.

The collective sum of all sports departments: Boy, did you guys ever change over time, from the days of Licker getting his head shaved in the basement to Jared Diamond learning the secrets of The D.O. from me. You’re not as bad as they all made you out to be. Except for in situations involving E&J brandy.

Becker: I really didn’t like you when I first met you, but you got exponentially cooler as the years went on. You’re usually the first person I think of when I’m drunk dialing, and definitely the only person to pick up every time.

Finley: You’re one of the weirdest motherfuckers I’ve ever met, but in the best way possible. Thanks for pushing the boundaries of what I would actually let you run (and for writing the best choose-your-own-adventure column ever).

Terry: Briiiiing-hah! One of my favorite memories of this place is sitting on the stairs with you bawling our eyes out while reading the D.O. 100 book. Those sections still make me cry every time.

Pete: Yeah, we didn’t work too well together, but as it turns out, you’re a great friend and a great guy. Sorry about all the shit that semester, as well as that one time on Spring Break when you crashed your car. The Overrated for life!

Jean: Neither of us really would have made it through that semester alone, but looking back, it was fun as hell. What I really miss, though, is living right next to you and being able to raid your overflowing closet. You’re a beautiful, amazing person, and you deserve the best in the world. Also, thanks for that one thing we’re never talking about again. Seriously.

Amy: Thank god we got to live together last year. I still miss waking you up with my honking every morning and being able to come up and snuggle with you whenever necessary. There are a few people in life who really get you, as a friend and as a human being. You’re one of those people for me. I will always love you; keep an extra set of car keys at the ready for me, wife.

Justin: Well, I did it, boss. I always told you I’d be a lifer, even though it was pretty much the hardest thing I’ve ever done. But you always believed in me no matter what, and that’s something I’ll take with me for the rest of my life. Thank you for being the best big brother a girl could ask for, and for punching me in the face a few times when I needed to come to my senses.

Omar: I may have been your momma bird, but you were the first bird I ever taught to fly. I’m so proud of what you’ve been able to accomplish now that you’ve found your wings, and hope that you’ll someday find an appropriately Adriana Lima-like woman who’s at least 10 years younger than you to make all your sick fantasies come true.

Seamus: It’s weird that you’re gone, given that I always felt like you were a year younger than me. You have been missed. Sorry about the porn at your bachelor party.

Sheebs: I’d consider you to be my second baby bird; I told you I’d make you a better writer! You’ve got a good heart and stand by your decisions, two traits often overlooked. I’m glad we had a chance to work together.

Peskin: That week we brought you into Feature was one of the best life decisions I’ve ever made, and I knew you were destined to be here. Thanks for taking care of the paper when I couldn’t be here, and for introducing me to penne alla vodka.

Meredith: I’m really glad I didn’t stick to my first impression of you, and I’m also thankful you were the person who showed me why it’s important to forgive. Otherwise, I would have missed out on a true friend. Give up all your activities next year and live in a perpetual cloud of booze and pot smoke – you deserve it.

Laura: Remember that one time in Pittsburgh when I slapped your friend across the face, then peed outdoors? I think that may have been the defining moment of our relationship. I’ve missed you this semester, and I can’t wait to come back and visit when the three crazy ladies are LIVING TOGETHER again.

Lil’ Koves: Yeah, no one’s called you that in a while. You’ve maintained your hilarity since freshman year (and our epic Thursday night beer pong quad overtime win), and I always have a blast hanging out with you. Good luck with everything.

Thursday night beer pong: You were sweet while you lasted and almost the end of me, but I don’t regret a minute of it.

Casey: Thank you for giving me a second chance, even after you made the Rong choice. You’re a hilarious and wonderful friend, the extent to which I was not aware of until I started working under you.

Lesley: Way to step it up and keep it cute. You rocked out design when we needed you the most, and motivated everyone to do their best work, especially me. Try to keep yourself sane in this place next year; I’ll be back with some pear vodka at some point to relive the Boner Jams.

Ethan: My respect for you has grown significantly this year, and not for lack of me wanting it to. You’ve proven yourself to be a great leader once you let yourself relax and take it all in. Good luck with the rest of your time here, and try to keep AJ in line. Or at least stop him from putting up so much porn on the computers.

The ladies of 707: Soooooo that whole not-working-here-senior-year thing kinda didn’t really work out. The fact that you guys are still friends with me even though I’m married to this place really says something about how dedicated and awesome you are.

Mom and Dad: Thanks for never telling me that I shouldn’t work here; most peoples’ parents freak out when they have a 2.8 GPA at the end of freshman year. I love you.

Pledge: You really proved yourself to be awesome when you not only made it through your hazing, but you did it in style. I’ve watched you evolve from a quiet assistant who wasn’t quite sure of himself to one of my best friends who loves chicken wine and taking photos with his mouth open. You have no idea how much I’m going to miss you next year.

Melanie: There’s no historical record of this, but you’re definitely the first D.O. little in history. And certainly the best. I knew we would be friends from the moment we met, but I didn’t know how awesome it all would be. I’m so proud of everything you’ve accomplished, and can’t wait to hear about your antics next year.

Katie: My sassy, jackaly other half, how I’ve missed you this semester. The exploits have not included enough giving of the old eye, shaving of the legs in the bathroom or general giggling behind the backs of men. We’ve seen each other through so much, and I can’t wait until we’re LIVING TOGETHER, because that seriously needs to happen, be it in Chicago, New York or any other location. We’ll rock the world.

AJ: Apparently my pirate patch seduction has worked out well. There are so many nuances of our relationship I could try to detail, but the fact is this: I never knew I could love someone so much until I met you. I can’t think of time better spent than Mac-ing off together, and every day is made better because I’m waking up next to you. Thank you for taking care of me, for putting up with me in spite of my numerous faults and for turning out to be just as strange as I am. I love you, murka.

‘Yes, my friend, The Daily Orange is bigger than all of us. It was here long before we arrived. It’ll be here long after we’re gone.’

Andrew Phillips, D.O. Editor in Chief, 1996-97

Published on April 30, 2007 at 12:00 pm