Zombies stagger after their prey. Their preferred meal: human flesh. In turn, those still living seek out a life with little food, no electricity and killing undead family members and friends.
Consider life in ‘The Walking Dead’ miserable. Watching it is just as bad.
AMC debuted its latest drama Sunday night, which features a sheriff’s deputy, Rick Grimes (Andrew Lincoln), and his fight to survive in the zombie apocalypse. Grimes wakes from a gunshot-induced coma to find the world overrun with the undead. He heads to Atlanta in hopes of meeting up with other survivors but finds the city overrun with zombies. Grimes also aims to find his wife, Lori (Laurie Holden), and his child, Carl (Chandler Riggs).
The show’s biggest strength revolves around the special effects used to create the zombies. They look gruesome, and ‘The Walking Dead’ uses a lot of them. In a park, Grimes encountered a zombie missing its legs, with most of its organs trailing out behind it. And to begin the episode, a little zombie girl tried to attack Grimes. Dressed in a bathrobe and slippers and clutching a teddy bear, she ran at him with half her mouth missing and blood smeared on her face.
‘The Walking Dead’ could win an Emmy Award for its special effects. Its real problem, though, is it will attract only the most ardent horror fans. With its excessive violence and a leaden story, ‘The Walking Dead’ will fail to develop a loyal and broad fan base, something AMC’s super-dramas ‘Mad Men’ and ‘Breaking Bad’ have already accomplished.
Few viewers will tolerate the graphic nature of the show. In fact, ‘graphic’ remains too light a word. Regard ‘The Walking Dead’ as a weekly, CGI-animated snuff film. In that opening scene, Grimes called out to the little girl with the teddy bear. The little girl whips around and then runs toward Grimes. He grimaces and then pulls out a revolver. He pulls the trigger, and the camera cuts to a shot of the little girl. You then see the bullet hit the girl, with blood expelling from her head. The shot goes to slow motion as you see the girl tumble to the ground and then see her body bounce back up. After that, Grimes goes on to shoot his former colleague, beat a random male zombie to death with a baseball bat and shoot several more zombies at point-blank range while trapped under a car in the episode’s final scene.
Television series shy away from post-apocalyptic settings for a reason. Post-apocalyptic storylines tend to take a long time to develop. You must make it through a great deal of misery to see the characters prosper. This works well in a film because a set time exists. Say the film ends in 90 minutes: You know the characters will either die or live within 90 minutes from the beginning. No need to sit through hours of horror. Even if it toned down its violence, ‘The Walking Dead’ still presents an incredibly bleak picture of life. It will likely take a long time to develop its storyline, and the program fails to compensate its viewers for sitting through this.
Skip ‘The Walking Dead.’ AMC delivers a lifeless program in every sense of the word.
Stayin’ alive
How to survive a zombie apocalypse in three easy steps
Picture this: The undead start to rise out of their graves across America. Maybe a virus caused it, but the living public might never know. The only concern is these zombies want human flesh — and lots of it — with greater cravings than a Kimmel patron at 2 a.m. Welcome to the zombie apocalypse. To help you survive, we compiled these tips.
1. Get yourself a gun
A zombie dies only when its brain stops functioning. Some zombie exterminators favor a machete, but the short-range weapon tends to force you to get too close to the flesh-eater. And for those weaklings out there, you might not have the strength to wield the two-foot-long knife. A gun remains your best option, the best offensive tool for protecting yourself. We suggest a shotgun: Use buckshot for a greater chance of hitting your target and aim for the head.
2. Find a horse
Fools will use a car. But face it, the gasoline supply will run out quickly, and if the electricity goes off, your Toyota Prius is even more useless than usual. You and your friends are meals on wheels. No, you need a horse, preferably a healthy one with a good bloodline. Opt for a faster mount over a stocky one. If you need to stage a quick getaway, you will realize the Clydesdale is a poor choice.
3. Practice constant vigilance
Mad-Eye Moody’s mantra stays alive, and as long as you use it effectively, so should you. Always keep your wits about you. When hunting or scavenging for food, choose a hunting partner who won’t distract you. Always carry binoculars in case you hear some rotting flesh falling off into some leaves nearby. Carry a map and compass on you at all times. (For many of you, learn to read a map.) Familiarize yourself with your escape plan before departure.
And if all else fails: Run like hell.
Published on October 31, 2010 at 12:00 pm