‘Tis the season: Sift through ABC Family holiday fare for best seasonal shows
It felt like Thanksgiving kind of got skipped over this year.
Holiday ads flooded in as early as the start of November. Malls finally pulled all of their “Now That’s What I Call Music 23” CDs in favor of playing nonstop Christmas jingles. And ABC Family, because it just could not wait, had a countdown to its annual 25 Days of Christmas programming schedule.
Yes, that means 13 extra days of early festive fodder. But we don’t have time for 38 days of Christmas. Even 25 is daunting. So I’ve singled out four days of viewing pleasure to keep you in the spirit without going insane.
Dec. 9
Easily your best bet of all 25 days. ABC Family starts you off easy with the back-to-back powerhouse of “Santa Baby” and “Santa Baby 2,” starring the extremely relevant and well-remembered actress Jenny McCarthy. Then at 6 p.m. comes “Holiday in Handcuffs,” in which Melissa Joan Hart kidnaps Mario Lopez and makes him pretend to be her boyfriend in front of her family. Again, that’s Clarissa, who explains it all, forcing A.C. Slater to date her. I know you can’t wait.
But there’s more. The ABC Family original musical “The Mistle-tones” premieres at 8 p.m. Holly, the main character with a seasonal name, wants in on a Christmas singing group, but someone way less talented gets her spot. I guess that’d be all right, except the group was founded by her now dead mother. There is no way she is going down without a fight, so she forms her own group of misfits: The Mistle-tones. It promises to be exactly what it is: pretty people singing Christmas songs. But keep your fingers crossed for a campy train wreck. That’s all I really want this year.
Dec. 10
There are too many “A Christmas Carol” adaptations. But “Mickey’s Christmas Carol,” getting the 7:30 p.m. slot, tends to be watchable. It helps that it’s only 30 minutes long and that its Scrooge is of the McDuck variety. The classic Disney cell animation is also much welcomed aesthetically over the creepy CGI Jim Carey of the Dickens novel’s most recent screen adaptation.
At 8 p.m. is the stop-motion picture “The Year Without A Santa Claus.” CBS holds most of the better specials, but this one tends to hold its own. The “Snow Miser – Heat Miser” song is a particularly worthy holiday earworm. So, if for no other reason, watch it for that.
Dec. 16
Take a break from the festive onslaught with the network premiere of “Toy Story 3” at 7 p.m. It is one of a couple of days that ABC Family has snuck in non-holiday movies and for that we should all be thankful.
Dec. 18
I’m certain that you could find “Home Alone” on TV before Dec. 18, but what plans do you really have for Dec. 18? Kevin McAllister wreaks havoc on two robbers trying to break into his house. How his twisted funhouse of torture never warranted so much as a “you need help” talk from his family is still baffling. Or maybe Kevin was in control of them the entire time. If you liked the ending of “Skyfall,” it’s basically the exact same as this movie.
And if you really want to devote more than four days to watching Christmas movies, you are certainly already watching “Elf” for the 65th time. So happy holidays.
Published on December 3, 2012 at 12:21 am
Contact Jeff: jswucher@syr.edu